Regardless of how true Joseph's report was or of who actually started the conflict between him and his brothers in the first place, Joseph was wrong to engage in talebearing. God's Word clearly condemns talebearing as an evil and foolish practice (see Proverbs 10:18; 11:9; 16:28). But what choices did Joseph have? What biblical alternatives were there to his going to his father as a talebearer?
There were at least three biblical alternatives to talebearing for Joseph: (1) prayer for his brothers; (2) forbearance; and (3) forgiveness. All three are based on an awareness of how much God has forgiven us in Christ.
Notice the first alternative is Joseph praying for his brothers. Praying FOR our counterparts in conflict, not AGAINST them, is consistent with Jesus' command to love our enemies and to "pray for those who spitefully use you" (Matthew 5:44). Prayer requests for our counterparts in conflict include: (1) that they might come to know the Lord, if they don't already; (2) that they might repent of whatever wrongdoing they are responsible for; (3) that they might not inflict any further harm on us or anyone else; and (4) that we might begin to understand the conflict from their perspective. Requests such as these keep our hearts open to the other alternatives of forbearance and forgiveness.
Are you in conflict with someone at work, at church, at school, or in your family? Are you tempted to talebear your observations of their blameworthy conduct to others? Before you begin sharing that bad report, how about opening up with a word of prayer...for the other person?
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